I am doing a bible study for the book Unglued by Lysa Terkeurst with Melissa Taylor and several other ladies with Proverbs 31. Unglued are those moments when you react to things that “bump into your happy”. You know those moments that derail you when you are focused on a goal.
There are two types of unglued people or a combination of the two. Within these two are two separate types of people First EXPLODER. Lets face it we all know this one by heart. Because when we think of being unglued we thing of someone who throws a fit and yells and screams. The two types of exploders or the “exploder who blames others” or the “exploder who shames themselves” The one who blames yells at another person then says. I am sorry but if you did this or that i wouldn’t be mad. You made me mad. When we do this we essentially give our power over our reactions to the other person. No one we blame wants that power over us and we sure don’t want to hand over our power. the one who shames themselves. explodes then feels guilty and starts comparing themselves to others and basically beats themselves up for the way they reacted. These exploders needs perspective with soul integrity and self control with holy restraint. I would like to emphasize HOLY RESTRAINT. Because i know without God I will not restrain myself no matter how hard I try.
Then we have the Stuffers, those who build barriers and those who collect retaliation rocks. If you build barriers then you block others out of your life and it could get to the point that you end up alone because you have closed yourself into a small room. Then the ones who collect retaliation rocks. These are you proof of a belief that you already have of what this other person already thinks.
For me I can see myself in every single one of these categories. Not necessarily one at a time though. The way it goes with me is I while I am collecting those rocks I am simultaneously building that barrier and once I have enough rocks. I hide behind my shield and throw those rocks at this other person. I blame them on the way I feel and how I am reacting then later I am ashamed of how I have acted and reacted to that situations. If I let myself i would be the exploder who blamed others. Yet I know that so I stuff and collect my proof. I am so afraid of being hurt anyway so my barriers have been built a long time ago but if I dare let them down a little and something happens they shoot right back up fast. If you have ever seen a video of a bank in Europe during a robbery you would see what I mean. They have this metal wall that comes down so fast that it could almost break anything that is under that shield. That is how fast my walls shoot up.
The last two chapters that I have read were on needing a procedure manual and kid-placemat life. Boy or boy do i need a procedure manual. That was such a great chapter and gave me so many insights and ideas of how to deal with things. Albeit I need to decide before hand what I am going to do before I get in that situation. It a plan on what you should do when you feel like you are about to have an unglued moment. I will go into this further.
To be honest I need to reread chapter 8 the Kid-Placemat Life but as of now my what I have gotten out of this is mainly based on perspective. Its deciding if what is getting under my skin and about to make me unglued really all that important? It’s also about the fact that I haven’t trusted God to sustain me and keep me safe. I haven’t allowed him to have control and show me his miracles in my life. Basically I am writing this based on allowing you to know what I am doing at least the beginning of this blog about.
Since I waited for Chapter 8 to start the blog. I am giving an overview. I might retouch on these other chapters later but not necessarily in the order Lysa wrote them in the book. She wrote them the way you are supposed to write a book and I am not that organized. At least not in my own mind.